Himitsu, ep. 1: if we only had a brain

I know that saying the manga is better is such a cop-out, but tell me, who would you rather bang?

Yeah, that’s what I thought.

(Just as a warning, this post is not only going to have spoilers for this episode, but also spoilers for the manga up until the first chapter of the second volume, which probably leads to spoilers for future episodes. So if you’re picky about this kind of stuff, sorry.)

Soul Eater, ep. 1: a healthy body and a healthy mind

Stylistically, Soul Eater is at least going to be hands-down the coolest thing you will see this season. Period. It is 24 minutes of pure awesome– awesome so pure you could snort it for a high.

I bet that’s what all the girls tell you, Soul Eater. That, and that size doesn’t matter either.

i’m bad at sports metaphors

This… is so uncomfortably true. Well, maybe minus the sports references, because it’s been a full year since I’ve watched a complete game of basketball. (And yes, I fully appreciate the irony of the first anime blog link on two if by sea to be a link to Jason Miao.) I know I find myself latching on to a show, enjoying the shit out of it, and then writing long commentaries that only delineate the flaws in it.

Conversely, though, with shows that I find not salvageable, I feel the need to find something meaningful or enjoyable about it…? And these days, I don’t know if it’s because I always see the glass as half full, or because I want validation that I’m not just wasting my time.

(Today, though, a friend of mine, who normally expresses disdain over my clandestine nerdy hobbies, demanded to know whether I ever feel like I wasted my time after watching a particularly bad anime. “No? Even if it’s bad, I laugh at it to myself…?” I thought this was going to be a serious conversation, but then he revealed he’d seen anime before. “!!!,” I said. “WHICH ONE?” “…Kimi ga Nozomu Eien.” really, wtf? orz)

Anyway, on a completely unrelated note, as much as I enjoy all the anime bloggers who sound like they have film theory majors (and really, I do, I don’t know how I could have conceptualized sexuality and textuality if it weren’t for Daniel), I still wonder: why aren’t there more bloggers with distinctive half-mocking half-loving voices? I mean, there are the lovable (? I mean sometimes. Other times– grating like Ayu and Parmesan cheese– oh that was a mixed metaphor, shit) trolls like lolikitsune, and Kurogane cracks funnies all the time, but it depresses me that I go to Derailed by Darry just so I can smile while lambasting Gundam 00.

Kurenai, ep. 1: avoiding the “is Murasaki loli?” debate

I wish I could be objective about anime shows, but unfortunately, I’m about as biased as they come. It’s not so much that I see a show about loli schoolgirls or Key adaptations or harems and then refuse to watch the show; it’s kind of more like the opposite. I’ll watch a lot of things rather idly, but when it comes to the things that I really like, my buttons are pressed like whoa and it’s hard for me to see through the haze. I’m not really even sure what exactly these red flags are– it can be something really stupid, like how my impressions of Night Wizard are completely colored by the fact that the last episode found my button for fake memories and sacrifice and pounded on it.

Which is why when I tell you guys that Kurenai is the most amazing show ever, take it with a grain of salt. Everything about Kurenai, from the voice acting to the dialogue to the music, attacks my most basic loves in anime.

(Sorry, guys. My screencapping technology failed me for this episode. You’ll have to forgive my lack of pictures.)

Blassreiter, ep. 1: …is Japanese for, “More CG namebadges, please.”

More like ASSREITER AMIRITE lol.

ahhhh, racing teams. Where your ability to have buttsex determines your worth.

…Too easy?

Itazura na Kiss, ep. 1: I hate stupid girls.

One of my debate teammates found me in the hotel room watching Bus Gamer and was like, “Oh my god, you don’t really watch anime, do you?” and I was like, “Yeah, dude, I totally do,” and he was like “How stereotypical of you!” and I was like, “LOOK MAN, I DON’T DO IT BECAUSE I WANT TO BE STEREOTYPICAL, OKAY.” Which is when I told him that for the most part I didn’t watch too many girly animes, except I didn’t mention my fondness for bl, and he was like, well, what do you watch, big-breasted anime? And I wanted to be like “God, no, I watch shit where guys have out of body experiences or are more in love with planes than human beings and then sometimes I trust Jason Miao and watch a whole series about succubi,” but then I opened the first episode of Itazura na Kiss. And despaired.

…is it bad that Minami-ke has me thinking, “That’s a trap!”

Bus Gamer ep.1: There were no buses.

I remember being really disappointed when I read the comic for the first time and found out there weren’t any buses in this series. Not even, you know, a minibus, or a school bus, or even a bus for public transit somewhere. It’s really quite unfair. It’s like how Code Geass promised us codes and geass (OR GAYASS AMIRITE) but instead just gave us girls masturbating against tables and obscene metaphors using pizza.

The thing is, even with context, this capture is still the same– absurd. Also, I like how this is an anime about violence and fighting and pseudo-gay and my lead-in picture is of tea….

like a preview, just without the information.

Spring 2008 has already started, and I still don’t know if I should try to follow 24 shows or just give up all pretense and only watch the anal sex ones.

Top Ten Crossovers

Every once in a while I realize that it’s not that I don’t want a new season of anime, I just wish they would remix the last one. With that in mind…

Top Ten Crossovers/Patisches I Would Die For

10. Hayate no Gotoku & Sayonara Zetsubou Sensei & Yakitate!!Japan

A show about butlers. A show about bread. A show about a teacher.

Just imagine the jokes. The nice thing about these three shows is that Yakitate!!Japan and Hayate would keep Zetsubou from going too crazy, Zetsubou would keep the other two from becoming too laid back, Hayate has the right amount of moe, and Yakitate!!Japan is the only one of them that has an over-reaching plot. How’s this– Pantasia is bought by Sanzen’ins, and meanwhile Hayate part-times there to make up for his debt money. It happens to be in the same neighborhood as the Zetsubou crowd. Cue antics. Or: they all go to Nagi’s academy. Or: they all go to Nozomi’s academy. Or better yet, they just make it a 2 hour OVA special where they parody .hack//sign, Dragonball Z, Sailor Moon, and Welcome to the NHK.

it doesn’t even believe in santa claus

This is a generic introduction that has nothing to do with aliens, time travelers, or ESPers. In fact, it really has nothing to do with anything at all. Especially not what the hell this blog is doing here.